This time of year I usually fill out a bracket for March Madness. I couldn't bring myself to do it mostly because it reminded me too much of my father.
Throughout my childhood I remember he and I waiting for the newspaper or Sports Illustrated with the blank bracket to fill out. We'd make copies and fill out our own. In recent years, even though he didn't follow college basketball as much, he would still print out the bracket and fill out the results of each round as games were played. Already, with the first round not even over yet, there are so many things he and I would've talked about. UCLA royally choking and losing the play-in game. The first 16 seed to beat a 1 seed. The Pac-12 having an epically down year.
I'll resume the yearly tradition and I hope to pass it on to my son. But for now the memories are too painful. Too many images I want to get out of my head, and others I don't want to forget.
Exactly one month after his passing, and I'm still not sure this is real. He's on a business trip. I'll see him when he gets back. My mom won't be alone in the house much longer...